Handling Conflicts Assertively
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Assertiveness is most of the time necessary when you are not prepared to accommodate another’s demands or to avoid conflict due to your integrity and self-respect.
What is Assertiveness?
- To declare strongly,
- To lay claim to,
- To insist upon,
- To affirm,
- To bear evidence,
- To defend one’s rights or opinions.
HANDLING CONFLICTS ASSERTIVELY
- Identify the Goal You Are Seeking.
- Choose the Right Time to Speak Up.
- Rehearse the Statement.
- Pinpoint the Specific Behavior You Want to Discuss.
- Explain your reaction to the Behavior.
- Make a Request.
- Describe the Consequences,
- How to express yourself effectively, self-assertion.
- How to say “no”
SELF-ASSERTIVE PHILOSOPHY
- By standing up for my rights I show respect for myself and I will probably also receive it from others.
- By trying to avoid hurting other people I eventually hurt others as well as myself.
- By sacrificing my rights, relationships are often broken and new ones are prevented from developing.
- It is a form of selfishness to exclude others from my thoughts and feelings.
- Sacrificing my rights teaches others to disregard me.
- If I fail to notify others how their behavior negatively affects me, I fail to give them the opportunity to change their behavior.
- I can decide what is important to me; it is not necessary for me to suffer under the tyranny of “must”.
- I appreciate myself more if I do what I believe is right and it improves my relationships with others.
- I can insist on courtesy and respect.
- I have the right to express myself in any way as long as I do not infringe upon the rights of others.
- I have the right to keep quiet.
- I do not need to please everyone all the time.
- I have the right to know what is going on.
- I do not need to give explanations for everything.
- I do not need to feel guilty if I say “no” or if I put myself first.
- I am not responsible for other people’s problems.
- I have the right to express my opinion and negotiate for change.
- I have the right to be listened to.
- I have the right to make decisions and bear the consequences of my choices responsibly.
